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Not My Own

outstretched hand holding white paper butterfly

In reflecting on what it means have accounts on various platforms as I enter 2025, I was struck by the thought that whatever content I'm sharing online and however I am doing so, it is "not my own."

Of course, this can be quite literal as there are all types of disclaimers included when agreeing to use such platforms. There's also the spiritual sense in that whatever I'm writing and sharing doesn't quite belong to me as things will pass away, including my time on this earth. Ultimately, when I think about how God led me to start Christian Shelves back in 2023, it really has been the work of His hands and something I need to commit to Him continually.

What does it mean that these accounts are mine to access but not to own?

First of all, I need to hold things very loosely. I have seen so many people lose everything due to AI or online providers indiscriminately shutting down accounts, and it's devastating to think that the hours of work and the creativity poured into content can all of a sudden be gone. I wish there was a way to combat this, but so many platforms have made it difficult to contest decisions once made. This blog is an example of that where it's coming up on a year since I've been able to share its link on Instagram. Though it's been a challenge and I've been able to work around it for now, it's certainly not ideal and provides additional friction when I just want to share information.

Second, because I view all of the gifts I've been given as gifts to steward by God, I need to be able to let go if I'm asked to do so. Right now, I've been content to share reviews of books I've enjoyed reading and hope that it's a small encouragement to those looking for Christian books. I see a lot of what I do as a service freely shared, especially as I do my best to exercise spiritual discernment where possible. However, I'm also aware that I'll always be running into issues of time and capacity. I've had to slow down my pace somewhat, but I am still so grateful for these platforms. As long as God allows me to be in this space, I will endeavour to honour Him. If He ends up closing the door one day, I will need to be obedient to Him.

Third, I recognize that anything I write isn't about me, but rather Him. Sure, I have fun talking about certain things that are personal to me, but at the end of the day, it's not about who I am. Though I put my heart and thought into what I write, I want the words to reflect Jesus most of all. Whatever I put out there needs to be for the edification of others rather than my own ambitions. This is likely the reason why I've downplayed numbers as much as possible, even on Instagram where it's easy to see those metrics. Obviously, if I'm fit to have a greater impact, I welcome it, but I want to be more concerned with the quality of what I post as well.

These thoughts remind me that God is the one in control and the One who owns it all. I'm thankful to be a vessel, but my prayer is that I can be emptied out in service of others and to glorify Him. I won't be able to take any books with me into my eternal life, so I'd best make the most of them while I get to enjoy them and pass the blessings along. May this be the approach that I take with reading as I await what's next in 2025 from God!
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