Review: No More Christian Nice Guy

No More Christian Nice Guy book cover on blue background

I've been wanting to share a review of No More Christian Nice Guy: When Being Nice–Instead of Good–Hurts Men, Women, and Children by Paul Coughlin for quite some time after having shared a review of the female counterpart earlier this year. However, I thought it would make the most sense for my husband to share his thoughts rather than me, so I'm excited that he took the time to write out what he calls "a book report" 😄

Book Synopsis

Recovering nice guy Paul Coughlin points the way for all men who yearn to live a life of boldness and conviction--like Jesus. Using anecdotes from his own life, powerful and poignant stories, and vivid examples from our culture, Coughlin shows how men can say no to the "nice guy" syndrome and yes to a life of purpose, passion, and vitality.

In this revised and expanded edition, Coughlin adds vital insights on the changes he's seen in churches and the greater culture in the decade since No More Christian Nice Guy was first published. This radical and hopeful message elevates the true biblical model of manhood and now includes testimonials from men and women whose lives have been altered by this book. Coughlin also looks at the shifting expectations men face in relationships and in the workplace, and how younger Christians, in particular, are subject to harmful views about masculinity.

Part inspiration, part instruction, and part manifesto, this book gives men the courage to move from passivity to assertiveness.

Source: Amazon

Book Thoughts (from Mr. Christian Shelves)

I really appreciated how No More Christian Nice Guy addressed the issue of stifled masculinity within the church and how taking the principles of humility and meekness too far, combined with not dealing with past childhood trauma, can lead to men that are conflict averse and passive. The author pointed to how being a Christian Nice Guy (CNG) can bring challenges to dating or marriage, as well as the workplace, as being nice to avoid conflict won't actually prevent or solve issues—something I can see from my own past.

As Coughlin points out, "…Christian Nice Guys believe, This world is a dangerous place...and the key to making through this dangerous planet is to keep my head down to avoid attention and [shudder] conflict" (p. 112). However, the book doesn't simply define this issue or point to all the potential causes; it calls men to be assertive (as opposed to passive and/or aggressive), to speak truth, to protect their family (even physically, if called for) and ultimately, to be like Jesus in a fuller sense. Men are reminded that we "are the salt—not the sugar—of the world. Season boldly, brothers" (p. 258).

Book Summary

Format of book: 📖
Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐
Recommendation: 👍

Comments

Christian Book Review Programs

Over time, I've been on the hunt for Christian book review programs that readers can join. As a result, I've been able to compile the following list which may be of interest if you are seeking review copies of Christian books. This list mostly applies to print and ebooks, although some publishers offer audiobooks as well. If further information is available for any of the publishers below (or any missing publishers), please let me know as I am happy to update this list—thank you! Please note that you can also search for these publishers on NetGalley and other review sites in case there are no review programs available or you don't qualify for one 😊 Christian Publishers B&H Publishing Group Previously offered the B&H/Lifeway Blogger program which has since closed Availability: Professors and instructors Link: B&H Academic Book Requests Baker Publishing Group Availability: U.S. and Canadian residents Genre: Christian fiction, Christian non-fiction Imprints: Bet...

Happy Chinese Language Day!

Today is Chinese Language Day! It’s a day that has meaning for me because I speak a Chinese language (a language that isn't easy to learn as an adult), so I'm grateful I didn't have to go through the process of mastering tones later in life! At the same time, I acknowledge that it also brings about mixed emotions when I reflect on my journey of language discovery. Despite Chinese being my first language, I still feel like an outsider to the culture and world because I don’t speak the main Chinese languages that everyone thinks of. It’s been one of my pet peeves over the course of my life where a lot of non-Chinese people have attempted to guess what I speak, maybe not realizing that there are so many languages that exist (guessing for other people doesn’t always bode well 🫠). Lacking Mandarin and only knowing select phrases in Cantonese, this feeling of separation from other Chinese people is even more pronounced in living overseas as part of the Chinese diaspora. While...

Review: Not Precisely Mr. Knightley - The Silver Teapot #2

I love that I've been able to read about Dream Match, a dating app, in some of Carolyn Miller 's other books and that I get to find out more about the origin story in this book. Not Precisely Mr. Knightley is the second book in The Silver Teapot series , and it's exactly the type of modern world I can see Emma thriving in, complete with the opportunity to matchmake virtual strangers on a scaled up basis. Offering both potential and pitfalls, it's only a matter of time before we see Emma discover what true matchmaking is all about. Many thanks to Barbour Books and NetGalley for providing a complimentary copy of this book for review consideration. All opinions are my own. Book Synopsis Can the Matchmaker Find True Love? Emma-Jane (EJ) Bennett and Jordan Knight are longtime best friends who codesigned the immensely successful dating app, Dream Match. Success starts to go to EJ’s head when she gets caught up in the famous and money-hungry socia...