Skip to main content

Review: No More Christian Nice Guy

No More Christian Nice Guy book cover on blue background

I've been wanting to share a review of No More Christian Nice Guy: When Being Nice–Instead of Good–Hurts Men, Women, and Children by Paul Coughlin for quite some time after having shared a review of the female counterpart earlier this year. However, I thought it would make the most sense for my husband to share his thoughts rather than me, so I'm excited that he took the time to write out what he calls "a book report" 😄

Book Synopsis

Recovering nice guy Paul Coughlin points the way for all men who yearn to live a life of boldness and conviction--like Jesus. Using anecdotes from his own life, powerful and poignant stories, and vivid examples from our culture, Coughlin shows how men can say no to the "nice guy" syndrome and yes to a life of purpose, passion, and vitality.

In this revised and expanded edition, Coughlin adds vital insights on the changes he's seen in churches and the greater culture in the decade since No More Christian Nice Guy was first published. This radical and hopeful message elevates the true biblical model of manhood and now includes testimonials from men and women whose lives have been altered by this book. Coughlin also looks at the shifting expectations men face in relationships and in the workplace, and how younger Christians, in particular, are subject to harmful views about masculinity.

Part inspiration, part instruction, and part manifesto, this book gives men the courage to move from passivity to assertiveness.

Source: Amazon

Book Thoughts (from Mr. Christian Shelves)

I really appreciated how No More Christian Nice Guy addressed the issue of stifled masculinity within the church and how taking the principles of humility and meekness too far, combined with not dealing with past childhood trauma, can lead to men that are conflict averse and passive. The author pointed to how being a Christian Nice Guy (CNG) can bring challenges to dating or marriage, as well as the workplace, as being nice to avoid conflict won't actually prevent or solve issues—something I can see from my own past.

As Coughlin points out, "…Christian Nice Guys believe, This world is a dangerous place...and the key to making through this dangerous planet is to keep my head down to avoid attention and [shudder] conflict" (p. 112). However, the book doesn't simply define this issue or point to all the potential causes; it calls men to be assertive (as opposed to passive and/or aggressive), to speak truth, to protect their family (even physically, if called for) and ultimately, to be like Jesus in a fuller sense. Men are reminded that we "are the salt—not the sugar—of the world. Season boldly, brothers" (p. 258).

Book Summary

  • Format of book: 📖
  • Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐
  • Recommendation: 👍

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Christian Book Review Programs

Over time, I've been on the hunt for Christian book review programs that readers can join. As a result, I've been able to compile the following list which may be of interest if you are seeking review copies of Christian books. This list mostly applies to print and ebooks, although some publishers offer audiobooks as well. If further information is available for any of the publishers below (or any missing publishers), please let me know as I am happy to update this list—thank you! Please note that you can also search for these publishers on NetGalley and other review sites in case there are no review programs available or you don't qualify for one 😊 List last updated: June 4, 2026 Christian Publishers 10ofThose Availability: US, Canada, and UK residents Format: Only books published by 10ofThose qualify for review requests so as to avoid impeding with other Christian book review programs Genre: Christian non-fiction, children's books Email for availability and eligibilit...

Life Up North

I'm going to go against my previous posts about keeping my opinions to myself on things outside of faith and reading by sharing some of my recent experiences instead. I figure that if we read fiction to broaden our understanding of other perspectives that it might be worthwhile for me to share how things have been for me as a non-representative Canadian (I'm not speaking for anyone else here!) 😄 I'll be honest in that it's been tough in the last few weeks and months. I've done my best to keep up my optimism and more importantly, my hope in Christ, Who is unchanging and steadfast. Rulers come and go, nations evolve and change, and politics can swing back and forth, but God is immutable and sovereign over all things. That being said, recent geopolitical factors have resulted in an emotional toll on me and a lot of the people I interact with in my life. While I am grateful that I can place my burdens at the foot of the cross, I recognize that others in my life have va...

Godliness as a Trait

I'm not sure why this thought came into my mind during church, but it's something I've been wondering about since then. Specifically, I've been trying to recall when I last saw characters in Christian fiction being described as godly, notably for the heroine. While I understand that godliness may be implied or that I may have even unknowingly glossed over this word while reading, I was thinking about what it means to have a main character who is more known for their godliness than for their beauty or intelligence. That's not to say that any of these attributes are mutually exclusive, but I'm questioning whether the appearance of godliness might be more elusive than I realize (or on the flip side, am I completely missing this when it is prevalent?). I recognize that there is usually a tension between making a character both relatable and yet aspirational. If a character is too aspirational, then I can see readers having a hard time connecting with them as the ch...